No Box Thinking ® with Dinah Liversidge

How do you start a new Mindset Language? Learn a new Mindset Language

March 12, 2021 Dinah Liversidge Season 2021 Episode 25
No Box Thinking ® with Dinah Liversidge
How do you start a new Mindset Language? Learn a new Mindset Language
Show Notes Transcript

How can you start learning a new language for your mindset? One word at a time!

In this fifth episode of my March podcasts, I look at how you can change the language that has become your head-talk.

I’m Dinah Liversidge and I’m a Coach and Trainer, a Celebrant and co-host of The Charcoal Hut, a woodland cabin in Myddfai, Carmarthenshire. I’m also a no-box-thinker. I believe when we stop trying to ‘think outside the box’ we take away labels and limitations that were always an illusion. There never was a box.

I love being a Coach, a Celebrant and a Host. All these aspects of my life help me achieve that illusive ‘work-life balance’ so many seem to be striving for. Join me in Myddfai in our woodland garden for a #MyddfaiMinute and listen to one minute of birdsong. I hope it brings you some peace.

If you’d like to explore Coaching, take a look at my Mindset Coaching here. 

I hope you’re enjoying my Podcasts. I’d love you to share them with someone you think would get something positive from them. 

Dinah  

Speaker 1:

Hi there. I'm Dana. Liversidge welcome to my no box thinking podcast. This month, I'm focusing on how you can learn a new language to support your mindset. This is the fifth in 10 episodes, and today I'm focusing on how you start a new language. Yeah, growing up, I had a mom who was a language teacher. In fact, she's a linguist and speaks a ridiculous number of languages. Um, I always used to point out to people I am adopted when they discovered that I didn't speak anything like, uh, my mother could, because it wasn't something I had inherited. However, she did everything she possibly could to help us. My brother and I embrace new languages. And one of the ways we did this was that on certain days or evenings, we had to ask for things that we wanted in French or in Italian, or sometimes in some other bizarre, more unusual language, something we were less likely to have encountered. And it was really quite good fun, occasionally very frustrating because you'd realized, gosh, it's been so long since I used this language that I don't remember what I was taught last time, but in the languages we used regularly, we found that this enabled us to use them in a way that made them real, that allowed our brains to call on the words at the right time. And as a result, alleviate that frustration when we went on holidays of not being able to communicate without being very British about it and just shouting a lot. So it taught me a massive thing. If I want to learn a new language, I have to keep using it over and over and over again. I remember being astonished when I was told for the first time, I think probably age five or six, that mum would dream in different languages. That's when you know, you're really using a language so much, it's become part of your dream cycles. So it's hardly surprising really that if we're constantly using a negative language, it's going to take practice to change that. And if you're thinking, well, this is all really obvious. If it's so obvious, I wonder why we don't do it. See, we repeat negative messages to our it's what keeps that mindset coming back for more. We feed it with our language, but we can feed a positive mindset too. We can replace language that allows one mindset to thrive over another. It took me many years to realize that when I was feeling gratitude, I couldn't also feel resentment or anguish or even grumpy gratitude is an emotion took up so much of my brain and my heart that actually I couldn't focus on anything except the positive when I'm in that space. And so it's no surprise that when I feel myself going down a leg, a negative language road, I know one of the best ways to shift my thinking on that is to instantly stop and think deep breath. Think about my daughter. See I'm smiling already. I can't help it. I am so grateful to be her mom. It's possibly the most joyous, wonderful, incredible emotion I can experience. And so when I know that the language I'm telling myself is dark and dangerous and not good for my personal space. That moment of gratitude for being her mum changes everything. When I look out the window here, I'm grateful for the trees and the Hills that I see today. I'm grateful for blue skies. And as soon as I focus on that, that language of gratitude, replaces, whatever the message of negativity was that I was telling myself, have you noticed how, if you focus on lack, that's what seems to dominate your life. So if you're constantly talking about what a difficult gear 2020 was financially and how negative that feels and how much you are lacking in what you could have earned, what seems to happen is you see more of what you're lacking. But if instead you can focus on one really positive thing that happened last year, everything feels a bit less of a weight. I'm not suggesting that your fears or your reality are in any way trivial. But when we focus on the bad times, they last longer. I say that as somebody who took a very long time to change some of her bad times, and I know the only thing eventually that really changed was my mindset. Everything else was the same as it had always been. But the way I saw it thought about it and spoke to myself about it, changed everything in my reality. So how do you start that new language, one word at a time, one phrase that perhaps you hear yourself saying replace that one thing my first was to learn to say, thank you. Instead of something dismissive or negative. When I was paid a compliment either about my work or my appearance or something I had done, I found it really hard to just say, thank you. And so my mindset always went to a place of imposter, but by saying thank you, everything changed, not least. I started to enjoy the compliments. So today, why not think of that? One thing that you could start as your new language, a language that's more nurturing, that's more encouraging. Perhaps that's even more acknowledging of what you really are capable of. Thank you for joining me today. I hope you'll come back next time. And if you're enjoying the podcasts, please share them. Remember no point in trying to think outside the box, there is no box.